Fear and Sage

Hello, friend!

I don't know about you, but I love these weekly chats! Thank you for coming back each week with an open heart and an open mind. As always, if you have any questions or comments, let me know! I'd love to chat about it. We can do that here, in the comments section, or you can come find me on Twitter or Instagram. Whichever way, I'd love to be helpful if I can.

So, today's topic is Fear and Sage. When my guides told me "fear" I was like, "Didn't we talk about that last week?" I guess we're not done. *shrugs* I'm just going with the flow here, so let's see what we see. 

It doesn't matter whether you're like me and you're Spirit Sensitive, or you're an Empath, or you think you're neither of these. But maybe you're surrounded by...well, weird feelings. Or maybe it's even worse than weird feelings and you've got the creepy crawlies, the heebie-jeebies, the hell-no-I-ain't-going-in-the-basement NOPES. No worries, I don't judge. 

I think I might be able to help with that. 

But, this is two-fold. It's important to pay attention to whether this is an overall feeling or a feeling that only happens when you are in a particular room or around a certain person or object. 

Let me give you two examples.

Example One - Overall Feeling

When I first began my development journey, truly accepted this path and began doing exercises to open and explore my abilities, almost immediately I was overcome with a sense of ... foreboding. There's not really any other way of saying it. All day long I felt on edge. Like shit was about to go down. It could be the most relaxing type of atmosphere and I was ON. GUARD. Nighttime was even worse. I could barely sleep. Every noise in the house sounded like a gunshot. I could hear my kids grumble and toss in their beds. I slept on the couch a lot to try to keep from waking up my husband. It was all very unsettling. It was almost enough to make me say, "Fuck this," and give up.

Some people have asked me whether I feel like this sort of thing is because of an attachment. The short answer is, "No". 

Essentially what was happening was ... me. It was all me. My senses were opening. I was able to hear, see, smell, feel, and know things with a new sense that I didn't yet totally understand. 

No wonder it was overwhelming. Now, that's not to say that's how it will feel for you, should you decide to develop. But, for me, I think it was more of a situation where those things were already developed and at some point I just turned the master volume WAY DOWN. So, when I was like, yes, okay, let's do this—It was like, BAM! 

Basically, my feeling was all about LACK OF CONTROL. I no longer felt in control. Of my self. Of my surroundings. Of my abilities. And with lack of control comes FEAR. I didn't know how to turn this damn thing back off. Or down, at the very least. I was afraid that I would never be able to, that I'd never be in control, that I'd attract all kinds of spirits that would "attack" my family, especially my kids (who were much younger at the time). I was just afraid. 

Now, in situations where you are NOT developing and you are still dealing with an overall feeling, there is a possibility that you've absorbed energy from others. We've talked about that before. Generally speaking a really good Grounding & Cleansing should help you feel better.

So, the thing I've learned since that really rough time (for me) is that there is nothing to be afraid of. Spirit only wants good things for us. Spirit only has our best and highest good in mind. Spirit also cannot affect free will, so while they can open doors and send signs through multiple channels, they can't make us do anything. But they really do only want whats best for us. 

Good Vibes

The trick is keeping ourselves grounded and our vibrations high. When I first started this path I would see that written in lots of different places: "Keep your vibe high." I'm like, "How the hell do I do that?" Ugh. I was so frustrated. 

So, here, let me explain.

I'm going to use the Heaven and Hell imagery to paint this picture, because it's the most widely understood.

Picture Heaven above. Then, picture Hell below. You're right in the middle. Well, your Earthly body is, anyway. So, Spirit Guides and Angels vibrate at the level of Heaven. If you keep your vibe or vibration higher, it's working to meet them in the middle, now sitting somewhere above your Earthly body. The higher you go, the easier it is to connect with your Spirit Guides. Plus, it's that much harder for anything icky (read: anything from below) to reach you. Makes sense? 

So, how do you raise your vibration? It's easier than you think. It is legit anything that makes you happy or content while you are doing it. For me, it's anything creative: writing, writing in and decorating my journal, painting with my daughter, drawing, coloring, crafting. Recently, I have discovered a love of playing World of Warcraft with my husband and sons. It makes me so happy. Pretty sure that is what raises my husband's vibe. For Jade, it's being on the treadmill. For another friend I have, it's anything to do with nature. Which, I gotta say, being in nature makes me pretty happy, too. I just don't do it as often as I should. See what I'm saying? What do you love to do? 

Also, I need to mention here that journaling is a great way to figure stuff out. You can get closer to what you love to do, discover your strongest Clair, decide how you really feel about that new promotion, talk with your Spirit Guides. There are tons of prompts you can try. If you haven't journaled since grade school, I highly recommend it. 

Example One - Specific Feeling

Let's talk about this example for a few minutes. This is a great example of how tricky it can be to get to the bottom of what is causing the feeling.

When my third kid was born, back before I officially "opened", we were given some furniture from a friend: a beautiful five-piece bedroom set. It had belonged to her father and he had recently passed away. We were so happy to receive it, having never owned something so beautiful. We split the set: the nightstands went in our room, the tall dresser went in our oldest son's room, and the short dresser with the mirror when in our daughter's room. 

Let me just say that, to the very least, all three of our kids are strong Empaths. If they choose to develop from there, that is up to them. Just saying. Okay.

So, at the time we received the furniture, our youngest was only a couple months old, still sleeping in the bassinet in our room. Our daughter had just turned three. Our oldest was six. Almost right away, our daughter started refusing to sleep in her room. We'd find her on the couch most days. It was super frustrating. Mostly, we just chalked it up to the things you go through when you add another kid to the mix. 

Well, the baby got a bit older so we moved him to his own room. Then, eventually, to his own bed. Our daughter was still having trouble sleeping in her own room regularly, except, instead of finding her on the couch, we'd find her in her little brother's room, sleeping on the floor next to his crib and then a little later, snuggled next to him on his toddler bed. I mean, honestly, it was really cute. So, eventually, we got them bunk beds, moved the dresser and mirror into his room, and turned her old room into a playroom. That worked, for a while. We'd still find her on the bottom bunk with him. Figured it was because she was afraid to sleep in the top bunk, that maybe it was too high. 

We let it go, figuring it was just kids being quirky. They were little, so what was the big deal, really. Except, eventually, she did get to an age where she really did need to be in her own bed. So, we separated the bunk beds and put her back in her old room with a new dresser, and left the other dresser in his room. 

After that, on most nights found him in her room. UGH! I tell ya, as parents, we were so fucking frustrated at this point.

They got a little better as time went on, but a lot of times, we'd either find him in his sister's room, or out on the couch. His sister seemed better, though. She'd sleep through the night and stay in her room. We figured it was an age thing and she just grew out of it and that he'd do the same, but we kept after him and tried everything we could think of to get him to stay in his bed.

Fast forward to us moving to our new house here in Iowa. We got here a couple of days before the moving truck did, and the first night we all slept in the living room on blow up mattresses. Everyone was fine. After that, the kids slept in the living room on their blow up mattresses, while my husband and I slept on ours upstairs. Again, everyone was fine.

Our furniture gets here, and all of a sudden the youngest is freaking out. He's coming into our room every night, talking about how he can't sleep, he's afraid, there's something in his room. WTH!

Mind you, one of the first things I did when we got here was sage the house. So, I sage his room again, but make him help me this time. It helped. For a few nights. Then I started finding him on the couch again. I finally sat him down and asked him to just tell me what was going on, to be honest. He said that he thought he saw "eyes" from underneath his dresser. His sister happened to be walking by at the same time he said that. She stopped in her tracks and said, "I've seen that, too!" She explained that she used to get the creeps from the dresser and see "eyes" underneath it when she was really little. 

We immediately moved the dresser into the garage and saged his room. He's been sleeping in there—with no problems at all—ever since.

But then, this funny thing happened. After that, everyone was afraid to go in the garage. So, I saged and bubbled the dresser and made my husband take it to the dump. Then, I saged my garage. THEN, I remembered that we still had the mirror wrapped up inside the house! FFS! So, I saged that, too. After all that, I asked everyone to tell me how they felt in the garage and near the mirror. Everything was clear!

Whew! Thank GOD! I mean, for the love of humanity, right? Looking back, I wish I'd made the connection sooner. I feel terrible for all the nights of broken sleep my kids had to endure. I'm glad they were able to rely on each other and that they were able to form a bond. I'm also happy that I was (finally) able to learn the lesson here. Which was that sometimes energy attaches itself to objects. As I was cleansing it, I was sure to open myself and ask if there were any active Spirits. While there were not, I was guided by my own Guides as to how to complete the cleansing process. Which was basically just a sage like you'd do in a home, but focused on a particular object. 

Sage

To sage a home, it's really simple, actually. Get yourself a white sage bundle. You can find these in any crystal shop or even on Amazon. They are not very expensive. It's recommended to have a feather in order to direct the smoke, but your hand will work, too. Also, from experience, keep the matches or lighter you used to light the sage on you as you walk around. Sometimes the bundle will go out and you'll need to relight it. 

You'll always start by setting your intentions: 

Out loud or in hour head, ask your Spirit Guides to come to you and help you - State that you intend to cleanse your self and your home of all stagnant and negative energy, for the best and highest good of all.

To sage yourself:

Light your sage bundle and, starting at the top of your head, allow the smoke to cover your body, down to your feet then back up. Then you can move on to your home.

To sage a home:

Before you start on the house, open a window in each room. This allows an exit point for the energy. Start at the Northern point of your home. You'll move in clockwise pattern. When you get to a doorway, move your sage bundle in an "x" pattern through the doorway. When you are in a room, make sure to also move in a clockwise motion, and use the feather or your hand to "blow" the smoke up into the corners of the room, since that is where energy tends to gather and grow stagnant. 

Make sure to repeat a mantra while you sage. Different people use different mantras, so there's not really a right or wrong way to do it. Whatever resonates with you is what you should use. The only thing I say is, make sure that your intention is set with love and that you are always respectful. Here is what I say: "I clear this space of all stagnant or negative energy. Only that which comes from light and love is permitted here."

When you get back to your starting point, make sure to snuff out your bundle and give thanks to Spirit for this cleansing.

To sage an object:

It works nearly the same as when you sage a home. You'll want to set your intentions and sage yourself.

Then, allow the smoke from the sage bundle to cover the item as you repeat your mantra. When you are done, be sure to snuff out the bundle and give thanks. 

When I sage objects, I like to do so before I bring them into my home for the first time. This is applicable to things that have been handed down to our family. If I need to sage an object that is already in my home, I sage it where it stands, then I sage the room.

Kids and sage:

If our three kids have taught us anything, it's that kids are naturally open. If your little one is having a hard time at night, having nightmares, refusing to sleep in their bed...don't be so quick to dismiss their behavior. Listen to them. Let them tell you about their nightmares, about what they are afraid of as they fall asleep. Then help them. There is an AMAZING lavender sage spray on amazon that I fucking love...I have recommended it to several people and they love it now, too. It's safe for kids, smells great and is super helpful. Get it. Give it to your kids. Teach them to set their intentions. Let them spray it in their room. Teach them to bubble themselves before they go to bed. That's all I ask. From experience, it's not going to "cure" the problem...but it WILL help. If nothing else, I promise it won't hurt anything.

All right. I think I've talked your ear off enough for today.

The moral of the story here is to pay attention to when you are feeling this FEAR and try to drill down to what might be causing this. Take part in things that bring you joy and happiness which will keep your vibe high. Ground, cleanse, and sage. And rest assured that you are safe and loved. 

I hope that you will give these things a try, that it helps you and your family, and that you'll let me know how it goes! More so, I hope you find this helpful.

As always, Namaste

💖

Alain Davis

@HopelessOptimst